Zitat:It’s been a while since I’ve sat down to clear my head.

As you know, I write to think and express myself clearly without using violence as an outlet to vent my frustrations. It helped me in the past, but to be honest, things were getting much better lately. Life has been easier for me since Steve got here and the last month or two especially have been so good to me that all this anger I had been accumulating since meeting that ‘masked disease’ seemed to be slipping away.

Of course, destroying Colt Cabana in New York City, and our triumphant victory over Cabana and ‘him’ in the South Philly Street Fight for HDNet certainly helped. And I remember, just a few days before Death Before Dishonor, being engulfed by an overwhelming feeling of peace and serenity as I realized that I was finally ready to move on with my life. In a few days I’d be done with ‘him’ and then I would finally be able to concentrate on other, much more important things. Like helping Tyler.

But it didn’t quite turn out that way.

Death Before Dishonor VIII was a huge night. But ever since the event, people have been trying to cast a shadow upon my triumph. Not just the fans but ROH officials. It makes me sick. I have heard over and over that I didn’t really get the job done in Toronto. I think they even said that on the commentary after the match! Now I know, in the weeks and months leading up to the match, I said I was going to kill ‘him’. End him. I know. But the fact that he managed to walk out of that building under his own power does NOT mean that I failed!

I mostly did what I said I was going to do. I went in there, even accepting the fight on his terms, as opposed to waiting for the top tier slot our match had rightly been assigned to, and I beat him senseless by using nothing but what God had given me. Regardless of what some people may claim, there should be no doubt who deserved to win. I beat him, left him defeated and broken. But I’d be lying if I didn’t say that once that final bell rang, I still didn’t fully intend on snapping his neck and finally finishing things.

But then something happened.

As he was being carried away by two referees, I fought the incredibly strong urge to put him out of his misery once and for all and as I climbed the turnbuckles to celebrate my victory, looking down on him as he was being helped out, this indescribable rush came over me. It was then that I realized that even though he was walking out, I had just proven what I’ve known for years and what everybody should have known as well – I am BETTER than El Generico. I was the backbone of our team. I carried us to the ROH World Tag Team Titles. It was ME! My God, the rush…it was orgasmic!

That’s why I made the choice not to finish ‘him’.

I wanted ‘him’ to live with that knowledge, forever. I took the high road and let ‘him’ live. And what do I get for that? Recognition? Of course not. Appreciation? Certainly not. Hell, I even got attacked and beaten by that sore loser; choked out like an animal by a rope or a belt of whatever it was.

I assumed that ROH officials would take actions to make sure something like this would never happen again, to ensure that I would finally be free to concentrate on the. But as I got off the phone with Steve Corino last night it was obvious that the only actions ROH officials were willing to take were the ones that would benefit ‘him’.

Those same officials have decided that Steen versus Generico II will happen. And it will happen on July 23rd, in Collinsville, Illinois.

And while my initial reaction to that news was less than positive, thinking about it all night has turned the tide a little bit. I’m certainly not happy about having to face ‘him’ again, just one night before the biggest match of my career in Chicago. But at the same time, this is where I get MY redemption. MY revenge. This is where I correct the mistake I made in Toronto because this time I can promise that there will be no mercy.

This time, El Generico, I swear:

I am going to rip your head off.

Yours Forever,
Kevin